brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
