they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone š
I feel kind of like weāre in a gang and tonight is one of those āpeople are gonna know not to fuck with usā type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. Iām not really sure how I got to this point in my lifeā¦ but I like it.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
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