If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
