It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
