WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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