Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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