I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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