Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
we're so committed to being not committed
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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