your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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