so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
