And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
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