Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize