Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
