I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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