Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
