my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
