he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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