Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
