You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
