Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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