ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize