Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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