Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I think I won the penis lottery.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
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