Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize