thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
