I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
