Sponge bath it is.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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