Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
