I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
