One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
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