He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
