Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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