Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Floor bacon is actually really good
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
