Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
