Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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