5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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