Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
