Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Boobs are out for the taking
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Randomize