Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize