Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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