its not stalking. its research.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
