I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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