Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Randomize
