Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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