hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
