How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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