oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize