I'm eating all of the evidence.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Randomize
