i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
