Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize