you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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